penn

6 hours later . . .

I'm writing this from Forest Grove, OR. Last night, after work, I made the grueling haul up to McMinnville to visit an "old college friend" (I can't believe I'm saying that already!). She's going to school in South Carolina and leaving soon, so I figured this was my last chance. We had good breakfast, and now I'm up in Forest Grove to work in the library and get some job applications done. Tonight, I'm hopefully going shopping and hitting a movie with another college friend.

I realize that I just wrote my post on loneliness and the new joy of being alone. I'd also like to say that living in a remote, small town with few people my own age has also expanded the joy of seeing friends. I can't stand driving, and I always used to view my 3.5 hour drive home to see my parents as this horrible journey. Yet, after working an eight hour day, I decided to drive six whole hours just to get out of my town for a little while. It's not that I dislike my town; as far as coastal towns go, Gold Beach is great. But not socializing with anyone my own age (b/c the 12 year old I sometimes talk to at open mikes is nice but a little) can be wearing.

PS being back at my university is kinda funny. I love it here (wonderful place, Pacific University), and I know lots of people. I'm sitting downstairs in the main building at the laptop bar, and the technology service offices are all down here. I worked in this basement for most of my college career, so I'm fairly close with all the guys. They just walked by and recognized me, so we had a nice little chat and they gave me a peptalk for the job application I'm doing. It's nice to be loved and recognized.

I think the solution is for me to ultimately have a nice little place in an urban area where I can meet those of my own ilk. I miss chatting and having game nights or cooking dinner with friends. I thought this morning out to breakfast was just wonderful. And I am so excited to be back up in this area again.

A New Peace

I'm finding a new peace in living alone. It's much different than living with other people and being alone because they're not at home. When that happens, you're lonely. Someone should be there; being alone is not the natural state of that place.

But when you live alone, not only is there not anyone there, but there isn't supposed to be anyone there. Why should there be? You live alone. Mentally, you plan accordingly; you count on being alone. In fact, when that aloneness is intruded upon, it's hard not to feel violated.

For example, my landlord often stops to chat with me. This is all well and good, but after a day of chatting with anglers and tourists at the port, I just want to enjoy the little place on earth that, for now, is all mine.

MIT Survey

Photos from London

First, I'm completely shocked at the bombings in London, but I suppose everyone is. Last year, when the Madrid bombings happened, I found out when I visited a department store late in the day, since I had no other way to access news. Now, this year, I again have little contact with the outside world except via my computer. I heard about the London blasts on Dooce.

I've spent the rest of the afternoon reading about the blasts and looking at the photos up on flickr. Some of the images are quite eerie; folks posted from their camera phones while fleeing the underground or looking out their office windows at the mess outside on the streets.

I can only hope that more attacks do not occur, but I'm sure they will eventually. For now, however, I wish peace and healing to the people of London.

My New Car

In all the recent excitement, I forgot to post that I did indeed find a new car. It's a 2004 Toyota Corolla, and I've been enjoying it. The only thing that's missing is a cassette deck (it's got a CD player), but I bought a combo deck on ebay and now just have to figure out how to install it (side note: if any of my readers know how to install car stereos or have experience removing parts of molded dash boards, I'd appreciate moral support and thoughts via email).

There is no name as of yet for the car, but that could change. I just haven't been inspired yet.

Last thought: it's bigger than the older corollas (ie 2001, 1999, etc that my mom and brother have). Good thing, because I can fit more stuff, but I have noticed that my gas mileage is a little lower than in the corolla I drove for the past year.

Tidbits

As of the writing of this post, I had 1000 comments. Yay!

Work kinda sucks. I never thought I'd actually say that; I'm usually quite optimistic. But I will be happy when these three months are done. I have less than 90 days to go now. Mostly, I'm just tired, and I counted a ton of fish today. I think everything will be better after I go to bed early tonight.

Grad school decisions are quickly approaching. I've been doing lots of research. So far, the only thing I've figured out is that I want to get off the west coast and go somewhere new. Indiana and Boston are high on the list right now.

The 4th of July show in Gold Beach was actually really amazing. We had a great view at the port, traffic was quite smooth (took me maybe an extra 2 minutes on my 4 minute trip), and we got hot dogs and corn on the cob. That is the definition of a good 4th. Plus, I didn't use any of my fireworks, so I still have those. I think I'll save them for some night when I feel particularly child like. They're pretty small and really quiet (ground bloom flowers and one quiet fountain -- quiet is important in my fireworks, since I don't like close by loud noises), so I'm sure I won't have any trouble whenever I feel like setting them off.

My mommy bought me salmon, halibut, and tuna. She and her friend also made me TONS of pasties (6 frozen, and filling to make 6 more when I thaw the dough). I've also got some other leftovers in the fridge and freezer. I will be eating well for quite some time. Thank goodness for mommies.

Sharing is Caring

My bandage from surgery -- it was just enough that people realized they couldn't talk into my left ear (looks like right, but only because of the mirror).

In this picture, you can also see my unwashed hair, since I wasn't allowed to shower for several days. Also featured is my button up shirt that I wore for several days after the surgery to avoid irritating my ear by putting on a normal shirt. the outside of my ear was in pain too because my surgeon removed some of my tragus to use as skin on my eardrum. I had nifty stitches for quite awhile, and now my tragus has a weird little bump taken out of it.

My Apartment

The rough layout of my apartment, and totally not to scale. the living room is the biggest, but the kitchen isn't quite that big. the second bedroom is pretty small.

in the kitchen, the double thick line is a wall, and the thin line is a half wall. the yellow squares are the fridge (outside wall) and stove, and the green squares are the countertop. The rest of the pictures are behind the cut.